Did you ever wish you could talk like a Troll?
Now you can! Your speech may not turn out to be pure Ogham since it’s difficult to sound out hatch-marks and slashes, but you can come pretty close to Troll Idiom if you salt your language with a few words from grumbly old Yahbut’s Lexicon below. You may even be able to do what Yahbut does — say things that are insulting without the person you’re insulting knowing what you really meant….
OF TROLL CURSES, FORBIDDEN SLURS & “SAY-NOT’S”
(translated from the Ogham originals)
Sneaderbender– One who hates to waste a booger
Sneaderbending – the art of booger-flicking
Crapplefrizzling– Shitting in your own or another’s hat
Crapplefrizzler – one who wears such a hat (above).
Note: a crapplefrizzling sneaderbender and a sneaderbending crapplefrizzler are both tasteless arse-holes and very, very similar, but they DO differ in how much effort they give to wrist-flicking versus doffing the crap-filled chapeaux.
Schnippzit! – What you say to a “freathin’ gleat”to shoo it away before you are forced to castrate it for its own good.
Freathin’ gleat – (translation: “Your father sleeps with [or slept with] goats.”) An insult sometimes used as a term of endearment.
Dangmeetl/ Dangmeetla – A cousin with three sets of sex organs (Use the latter feminine ending for cousins who are predominantly females)
Gelb-n-scotchit – (translation: “Go eat human waste!”) Also can be amplified by adding, “Woo-boy! Do a Naomi!”
Tripsy-goopin – (translation: “It’s obvious you’ve been bundling with your mama.”) Not to be used on twins or on groups.
Grata gorpo – Words describing those shitheads who are always grateful for any kind of attention – even the negative kind.
Schneckelfleb – A person who can kiss his own rear end.
Nozzacrotski ballmash – Jock itch (or a wish/curse that you might suffer from some semi-serious disease of the nether regions).
Norbnickety Ratmink – A coat worn in public that absorbs peculiar odors and farts that would otherwise embarrass the wearer.
Schizzlesquibber – Usually a youngster, but actually anyone who drools like a spigot or slobbers disgustingly.
Velb/ prissyvelb – A knob of any shape, usually on someone’s head/ a place to hang wet Kleenex to dry.
Xneptopop! – Word for bell-shaped or three-cornered testicles.
Ylanthy nebbintookus! – Curse to use if you or someone else has fallen on your ass and can’t get up.
Zeemidge – Pocket lint or what you dig out of a belly button
Freem – A cave or other hideaway (as a noun)/”To freem” (the infinitive) is also an action meaning “To Go Get lost!” (in a cave or other hideaway). To say, “I’m freemed!” means you’ve been buried in something undesirable (i.e. rat snot or gelb-n-scotchitted dung beetles.)